Day 7 - UK

1 April 2011

I must have been awake by 4am and just lay there listening to the wind howling past our van.

We’d left our dinner dishes outside overnight and I was sure they would be well gone. However, I’d shoved them under the van so although they’d been blown about a bit, they hadn’t disappeared.

Our first stop for the day was Tintagel, home of King Arthur and Merlin. We had a long way to go so we spent a lot of time on the Atlantic Highway. 

Cornwall is probably quite an amazing place in summer but right now it is bleak, cold and windy as hell. However, it seems to be nearly all farmland. We have driven past miles and miles of patchwork patterned land. Each paddock is bordered with stone wall hedgerows and between the lush green paddocks are paddocks of yellow, cream and brown. At the top of a hill it is like a giant patchwork quilt laid over the land. Unfortunately, wherever there’s a fantastic photo opportunity there is absolutely nowhere to park. There are no verges in this country!

What Cornwall does have though is some really nice rest areas where we could park our car overnight, except of course that we never pass them at the right time. Cornwall also has wind turbines. From whole wind farms to 1, 2 or 3 turbines. We drove alongside some of them and even with the car windows down I could not hear them. They are just stunning. I just can’t understand why people object to them. They are just so majestic looking. I mean really, if you don’t like them, paint the tower green and the blades yellow and you’ve got yourself a field of giant daisies!

I want a wind turbine!

Tintagel Castle

But enough of that. We got to Tintagel and paid our fee to visit King Arthur’s castle. It only cost 11 pound for both of us so pretty reasonable. We had to climb up treacherous looking slate steps up the side of a cliff and by god the wind! As we wandered around the ruins of what was once a thriving village and no doubt an imposing castle, there were times the wind was so strong I had to stand still to avoid being knocked off balance. As we neared some of the cliffs my legs went to jelly at the thought of being blown off the side. Aaron would give me a withering look “You’re 20 metres away from the edge!”

Thank god it wasn’t raining. I don’t think I would have attempted the many steep steps if it had been. Thankfully it was just windy as hell and really cold! Very atmospheric. By the end of the tour of the site my legs were starting to cramp slightly from the exertion. Just 1 week off the farm and I’m you’re average couch potato as far as fitness goes!

Tintagel Post Office

Tintagel Gorse Planter Box

We decided to have lunch in Tintagel but the only food shops open were selling Cornish pasties. Yes I know that’s their national dish but Cornwall has a reputation for excellent fishermen as well and I wanted fish and chips. It was not to be. Half the eateries and shops were closed. It was Friday and almost lunchtime and the village was half asleep.

Off we took, heading along the coast, looking for fish and chips. We stopped several times and every place was closed! What the hell?! You look at the opening times and it’s always 10 or 11am and only on Saturday, Sunday, Monday and Tuesday. Cornwall is proving to be an interesting place.

Eventually we got to Bude and we were both gagging for lunch. We parked, paid out 3 pound on the pay and display and the wandered some of the town. I had a bad feeling as we drove into the place and my intuition appeared to be bang on. It’s a big place but it’s a poor town. The first pub we walked into was almost devoid of furniture, devoid of customers and the fireplace was boarded up with plywood.

“Let’s leave” I said and we did

The next pub served fish fingers so that was an automatic no from me. We’d also just walked past a food bank.

“I don’t want to eat here”

We turned around, walked back to the carpark, got in the car and left.

From Bude we traveled along the coast hoping to find an authentic fish & chip takeaway bar in Westward Ho!  As exciting as it promised to be it was a let down. Way too modern for our tastes and so we carried on, eventually we passed a pub called the London Inn in a non-descript little village called Instow. The sign said ’Great Food’ and ’Free WiFi’. They had us hooked. We parked the car around the corner in a FREE carpark. Yes, that’s right FREE. God I love that place. Instantly forgettable but with FREE parking.

I had my cod and chips and Aaron had a steak and ale pie. The food was actually very nice. Not the greatest but I have to say my fish & chips was a darn sight better than any I’ve had in NZ in a while.

The Pub was very quiet and the barman very chatty. Bored stiff probably but friendly none-the-less. Unfortunately the laptop refused to connect to the Internet and I got the blue screen of death about 15 times before I gave up. There would have been tears had I not had a pint of cider and felt quite a mellow frustration.

Eventually we had to leave and then the pub owner appeared and wanted to talk to us. His daughter lives in Christchurch and was working in a central bank in Christchurch at the time of the earthquake. An horrific time for his daughter by all accounts but only months away from gaining citizenship she is staying put in the city.

And so we left this little town, whose name I have forgotten already. Not being rude but I am sitting here typing this with a near empty 500ml, 7.4% cider by my side and my brain has been cotton wool all day.

From there we drove up into Exmoor National Park and stayed at a campground in Barbrook.

It had a stunning view but oh my god the wind! We thought Cornwall was windy. The van was rocking all night. Funnily enough I slept right through the night so it must have been the constant swaying motion.

They had a laundry there and were low on clothes so I threw it all in. What the heck if they have a drier right? So everything went in the washing machine, beautifully washed and then I took everything out and looked at all the clothing labels. ‘Do not tumble dry’, ‘Do not tumble dry’, ‘Do not tumble dry’. Oh my god, you bastards! In the end all I could put in the dryer was underwear and Aaron’s jeans. Everything else had to be hung up in the van. Honestly, we suddenly became a Chinese laundry on wheels.

It was good to have a hot shower, although Aaron didn’t manage to get one. It seems the hot water doesn’t reach the men’s showers. Which is a shame as Aaron needed one more than me...


It was only after my shower and as I was drying my face that I noticed my nose was really sore. I had a look in the mirror and to my horror noticed one side of my nose was swollen and had developed a bright red rash. Hideous! Just hideous! And Aaron hadn’t even noticed and warned me about it. How long had I wandered around yesterday with something resembling Rudolph’s hooter?!


There was nothing I could do except hope that it would disappear overnight.